Since all human beings are different, it is completely normal that, on occasions, there are those who say or do things that we do not like at all. For this reason, we tend to select very well the people that we will let remain in our closest circle, such as friends and partners.
In general, we tend to choose as a friend that person who behaves with us certain things, such as tastes, opinions, goals, the way of seeing the world, religion, etc. Since this makes us feel more comfortable and at ease.
The same can be said of the sentimental partner. Sharing things in common makes the relationship more solid and stable and that we have future prospects with that person. Otherwise, the relationship would end in less than a rooster sings.
Of course, as you might expect, no relationship is perfect. There will always be aspects where we will differ from others. This is where tolerance and respect come into play. However, there are behaviors and situations that cannot be tolerated. Of course, this will depend on the person and the circumstances.
Currently, a term that has rapidly gained popularity has begun to be implemented in social networks. It is about the Red flags or, as it is translated in Spanish, Red Flags. This term refers to certain behavior that sets off our alarms. Something that makes us see that things are not going quite well and, therefore, it is necessary to take action and move away.
The red flags apply to any type of relationship, are it personal or work. In view of this, how do you know if your gynecologist has red flag behavior? What should you take into account when selecting your treating doctor?
Instructions to know if your gynecologist has a red flags behavior
Although it is true that we are all exposed to any type of violence at some point, women tend to be more vulnerable due to their natural physiognomy. These aggressions can range from inappropriate proposals to inappropriate touching.
Many women often have to deal with sexual harassment. This is a situation that could arise in different settings, including health care. In view of this, it is completely normal that, at a certain moment, you feel a little fear and mistrust.
Every woman, upon reaching a certain age, should begin to visit a gynecologist doctor. This, in order to avoid certain common diseases and to be aware that everything is going well. Previously, it was common to choose a woman as a gynecologist, because that allowed them to feel more comfortable.
However, as the world goes from bad to worse, in terms of morality, sexual offenders today can be of the same or different sex. In view of this, how can you know if your gynecologist has a red flag behavior? What signals should set off your alarms?
It is true that, at times, you could doubt and perhaps think that you are exaggerating things a bit. However, if something your doctor says or does makes you uncomfortable, something is surely wrong.
Keep in mind that there are limits that no doctor can pass. In case you detect some of them, it is best to change your gynecologist immediately and, if necessary, file an official complaint.
Some of the red flags that you should not allow, for anything in the world, are:
- The doctor insists on performing a pelvic exam while you are still a minor and with no apparent justification. Keep in mind that these types of tests are not recommended for women under 21 years of age, except in specific cases, such as when there is pain or abnormal bleeding. If necessary, it must always be with your consent and in the presence of one of your parents or representatives.
- He doesn’t wear gloves to examine you. During any internal examination, the doctor is required to wear gloves. In case he doesn’t intend to use them, don’t let him examine you.
- It does not offer you explanations about the procedure that it will carry out or does not consult you before doing it. In this case, you are within your rights to immediately terminate the consultation. The same can be said when performing inappropriate touches or any procedure that causes you pain.
- When you make any type of sexual or provocative comment. The same applies if he starts judging your sexual practices or sex life.
- Makes you completely undress or asks you to do so. It is important that you keep in mind that the doctor can examine different parts of your body, such as the breasts or the pelvis. However, while he examines one, the other should be completely covered.
If he asks you to lie down naked on a table, this is a request that you cannot accept, as it is completely out of line.
What do you need to know if your gynecologist has a red flag behavior?
By knowing what is considered normal in a gynecological consultation, you will be able to more easily detect red flags and take action in this regard. Some of the things you should expect are the following:
- Routine gynecological exams, for a person under the age of 21, do not include an internal pelvic exam unless there are specific concerns.
- In order to check the patient’s internal organs, the doctor will ask her to lie on the table with her knees bent and place her feet in the stirrups located at the base of the table.
The doctor will insert 1 or 2 of his fingers into the vagina, but these should always be gloved and lubricated. Your other hand should press on the abdomen from the outside.
- The doctor must always have a good communication with his patient before performing any examination. He should also offer her the presence of an escort if this will make her more comfortable.
- While it is true that doctors should and can ask about a patient’s sex life, they should never make inappropriate or sexually provocative comments.
- The purpose of discussing your sexuality is so that your doctor can determine what care to provide you.
- The doctor should only make physical contact with the patient as long as it is necessary. It must be minimal.
- In case you feel that something is not going quite right, you should say so.
Tips to know if your gynecologist has a red flags behavior
Now, what should you do if you feel that you have been abused during a visit to your gynecologist? Some of the things that can help you are:
- Trust your instinct. If at any point in the consultation you feel uncomfortable or believe that what is happening is wrong, trust it. Even if it was just a misunderstanding, everyone can learn from it about the importance of open communication.
- You can do this by going to the district attorney’s office to file criminal charges or by going to the state medical board.
- Talk to others. For example, an attorney can give you the guidance you need to determine if you can precede with a civil case against the treating doctor. If you need emotional support, you can visit a therapist or rape crisis counselor.
- After making the official complaint, make sure to follow up on it properly. Doing this will not only allow you to know that the procedure is on the right track, but with this action you can also help possible future victims, since you will be setting a precedent.
Visiting the doctor is not only a necessity, but also a right that you cannot hold back. Therefore, take into account the red flags that I have mentioned in this post to feel more confident in your next gynecological consultation.
